Sunday, 11 June 2017

French Vogue June / July 2017 issue

Don't you love French labour laws?

No, I am not being sarcastic.

I am not talking about flooding motorways with turnips or burning tires to block tunnels.

I am referring to clumping June and July issues into one.

You gotta love that they take the life / work balance so seriously so people can get a proper summer holiday.

There is a lot of reclining going on here.

I always did find Helmut Newton a bit repetitive.


I like this picture in its simplicity.
I am always amused at Chanel branding sports equipment.
Can't wait for the Chanel kettle bells.

Pre-Berlin Wall workouts are very much in vogue aren't they?

This girl's tan lines are going to be messed up.


I guess this girl is using diamonds to intensify her tan instead of aluminium foil.

Weak picture composition here.
Neckline detracts from necklace, earrings in shade, 
bracelet cropped, and too many shadows.


Editor Alt loves the spread crotch shot with eyes looking up shot.
It's the upmarket fashionista version of catalogue model trying to catch a cab pose.

Giselle was the last of the first name supermodels.
Sorry but Cara Delevigne doesn't make the cut.

I remember her breakthrough editorial on Allure.


She was my favourite model until she went Victoria Secret.


But then I am really predictable that way.


I don't know why Brazil needs to be so photoshopped.



I think editors of men's magazine need to push the transgender fashion look.
I notice the men's fashion and lifestyle magazines rarely get pushed this androgynous look as much.

Wonder why?
Gatecrashing?

Doing the robot dance that ran out of battery is not a good look on anyone.

I don't know what this means.

These shots do nothing for me.


Not pretty, not fashion forward, not inspirational.


This model kinda freaks me out.
In a French vogue way.

She seems like the token eccentric girl that some jaded model booker was captivated by due to being oversaturated with conventional prettiness.


I like this two skirt look.
On her.

This one looks like the winner of episode 8 in Project Runway.

Do you remember Pippy Longstocking?
This is the more expensive version of what she used to wear.

I love baby doll Dior dresses.
On her.

Hope you all have a good week!

26 comments:

  1. Oh dear.... you are not the only one who is a bit confused and unmoved by their editorials.

    SSG xxx

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    1. They were too busy booking holidays and buying swimwear to concentrate I feel! xx

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  2. Is there such a thing as "Mom" thong? I am getting that vibe from one of those pictures. I just don't get and never will get Vogue. Oh, not a fan of Gisselle. You can have her.

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    1. Mom thong! real housewives vibe totally. Giselle was beguiling until i found out it was all filler both front and back...

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  3. I love reading your posts on magazine, you have a very critical eye, in a good way and agree with all of your comments... Is it typically French to show so much skin? and as usual, I find some pictures rather scary! ;-)

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    1. I'm just a good old fashioned bitch hehe. French Vogue shows boobs more than the sun newspaper ever did Stephanie! ;)

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  4. love the commentary! glad i footboy to get this issue, starting to feel sorry for the models dressed up like an april fools joke :-)
    debra

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    1. The models are too hungry to care Debra ;P

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  5. Refreshing to hear your humorous take on all the emperor's new clothes. I always enjoy your blog.

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    Replies
    1. This issue was low on the fashion and everything else - thanks Melanie!

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  6. I'm not sure any of this can be seen as fashion. It's really like some sort of student photography/ fashion thing, rather than something that could be elevated to vogue. So many bare breasts. So many g-strings. So many models smouldering at the camera with their legs akimbo. Or looking bored and glazed over. No one is happy, or dressed, in French Vogue.
    Laughed at your comments on the model cab photo shot in catalogue. Here in little old Adelaide, the local department store had a special catalogue pose for men in the 80's/90's. One man would be touching the other man on the shoulder and pointing to something in the distance while they both looked surprised. Literally every page.

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    1. Such a weak issue - especially for 2 months' worth too. There are so many breasts that it loses all effect really. I think a content look would be nice - not crazy chicks laughing eating salad or aimless people in front of chateaus but just - oh yes i am loving this cup of coffee look. Surely. I do love a catalogue pose :)

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  7. I hope French Vogue reads your blog, Naomi! They badly need your sense of humour and to see this issue through your eyes! Hilarious! Best wishes, Pammie

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    1. Gosh - they would hate me for defiling and not being reverent Pammie!

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  8. Vapidity never works.
    On GSL.

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  9. Giselle is flawless in those shots. She is phenomenal.

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    1. I do wish she would just own up to the fillers but she does look great.

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  10. A Chanel exercise ball? Utter lunacy. And, I thought I'd already seen it all before. Tragic.

    Oh, and, going out in public sans skirt is not a good look, on anyone.

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    1. Imagine puncturing the ball too...Sans skirt isn't a great look but near nudity is so common now that it doesn't even raise eyebrows so you might as well look nice is what i feel like telling half those girls!

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  11. Oh my gosh, you make me laugh. I kind of love the Chanel gear. Always coveted a pair of the skis. I think that officially makes me trashy, but I'm good with that! xo

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  12. So glad you do these posts. They remind me why I have given up with fashion magazines. I do have a subscription to Harper's Bazaar but it might be time to let it go, I find these editorial photos so irrelevant anymore and not even done well, as you pointed out. I still love Chanel clothes and accessories (maybe I just love their seamstresses) but I would never ever spend money on Chanel-labeled workout gear. I hope all is well with you! xx

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  13. as usual, thanks for giggles on a dreary day. Chanel and athleisure - who'd-a-thunk-it?

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  14. You have me laughing out loud. So deliciously funny. Tonkath

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  15. Yes! Finally something about pull up gymnastic bar.

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  16. I hope you will go to the Christie's preview in London featuring Raine, Countess Spencer's collection. Get pictures of the jewelry if you do! Would love your take on her decorating style too. xx

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Thank you for dropping by!